Sunday, March 4, 2012

I Can't See It

Through out this process I have said that I wanted to be healthy and weight loss was a side benefit.  I have all the facts - I have gone from a size 18 to a 12 and I have lost 10% of my body weight.  Why can I not see it?  People tell me how great I am looking.  Why can I not see it?  I know I am making healthier choices.  Why can I not see it? 

I think Preacher Rick hit the nail on the head today - I am not letting go of the past.  In my mind, I still see myself as that obese girl. Today is the day I let it go!  I am making healthier choices in all areas of my life.  The results are now showing.  I am happier, healthier and more in love with Jesus than I have ever been. 

Half Way
I still needed  help getting my mind to see myself as I am now.  I took a picture that was taken at my Mom's retirement party.  It is two years old and was not at my highest weight.  When I started this journey in October, I weighed 5 lbs more that I did in this picture.  The second picture is when I received my 10% a few weeks ago.  I put them side by side and just looked. 

WOW!!!!!!!!!  I can hardly believe it!  If there was not a picture, I do not think I would believe it.  It is amazing how much I have physically changed.  I guess it happens so gradually that I did not see it. 

I am almost half way through my weight loss journey.  Sometimes things are tough.  I know now that I can make it because I am working towards being who God wants me to be.  I may not totally see myself where I am today, but God sees everything.  He sees my heart, mind, spirit, and health.  He helps me when those times are tough (like sopapilla cheesecake at the faculty luncheon - AGAIN! and no I did not eat it - but I thought about it).  Together we will finish this journey together. 

I wonder if I need to spend some time reflecting on what other areas of my life where I need to let go of the past.

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